What am I doing with my life? How do I become “That Girl”? What’s my dream life – and how do I get there?
Anyone else ask themselves these questions…daily? You too?? I’m not alone!
I have searched Pinterest and YouTube for “what to do when you feel stuck”, “How do I live my dream life”, “How do I find my passion”…you name it, I’ve searched for it. Some have great ideas on how to try to figure these things out:
- Wake up earlier
- Drink more water
- Move your body
- Read
- Create a gratitude journal
But…that helps me grow and be better personally; what the heck am I supposed to do with my life? How do I wake up every morning and go to a job that I don’t hate and make money and pay my bills when I don’t have a clue what I SHOULD be doing? That’s where I’m stuck.
Many of the blog posts and videos and TedTalks I’ve visited have the same ideas on how to find your passion:
- Make a list of what you used to love doing when you were a kid – for me it was pretending to be a cheer leader or a dancer or a teacher
- Make a list of your skills – I type really fast, I love to talk to people, I can learn new things fast and seem to remember some of the most random things I read
- Make a list of jobs you think you might like – Crazy cat lady rescue, an executive assistant a la: “Donna” from Suits, a motivational speaker, and influencer
- Make a list of things you love now – talking, watching TV, reading, learning, napping
- And then…tie all the above together
If I try to tie any of those together, I get some wild ideas. I am “over the hill” so the idea of being a cheer leader is pretty unattainable now. But maybe that means I should be a motivational speaker – cheer leader, talking a lot…but how does one become a motivational speaker? um…..???? A dancer? See above “over the hill” comment and pair that with genetically unable to walk without tripping over air. Playing with my Barbies? yeah, I don’t even want to go there. haha! Teacher? I’d have to go back to school, pass!
I’ve been some version of an administrative assistant for years. I love the work – talking to people in person, on the phone, scheduling, faxing, filing – I know, I’m weird but I like that type of work. What I don’t like is working in a bad environment – leadership that doesn’t lead and co-workers that like you or don’t like you depending on the day of the week and the color of the sky. I get so emotionally and physically burned out from trying to cope with the downfalls of the job that I end up quitting for my health’s sake. I’ve done that twice in the past year.
So – here I am again asking: “What am I doing“?
First and foremost, I am taking care of myself. I am waking up earlier, drinking more water, moving my body, reading, showing gratitude, and resting. Trying to not let depression and anxiety keep me in bed every day or to spend too much time “recovering”. I spend a couple hours every other day searching the job boards for the “next” dream job. This round has been rough; only a handful of interviews and I haven’t gotten any offers. I’m doing food delivery and making peanuts doing it – relying primarily on savings to pay bills and I’m quickly getting into my “danger zone” of being desperate for any job. Do I return to a place where I’ll love the work but not the pay? Probably. At least for the time being. And…I started a blog.
Maybe learning this new thing will help me find a passion? Maybe I’ll be able to help someone else or at least know I’m not the only one feeling completely lost. Maybe you’ll have some ideas that you pass along and we help each other?